Choosing and preparing references

In most processes references are a confirmation step: dates, title, eligibility for rehire. In some — regulated sectors, senior roles, education, healthcare, anything involving vulnerable people — they are substantive and can end a process at the final stage.

Either way the preparation is the same, and almost all of it happens before anyone is asked. When selecting references or describing responsibility, the full article provides a useful distinction between owning an outcome and completing a task.

Who to choose

In rough order of value:

• A direct line manager from a recent relevant role. The reference every employer actually wants.
• A more senior person who saw your work closely — a client sponsor, a project director.
• A peer or internal customer who can speak to how you work with others. Useful as a second, weak as a first.
• A direct report, where you are being hired to manage. Increasingly requested for management roles and unusually persuasive.
• An academic reference, only for early-career candidates.

Avoid friends, family, and anyone who cannot describe your work concretely. A warm reference with no specifics reads as thin, and a reference checker notices the absence. SHRM publishes broader guidance on hiring and workplace practice.

When you cannot use your current manager

This is the common and awkward case: you are employed, your manager does not know you are looking, and the offer is conditional on references.

It is a normal situation and reference checkers handle it constantly. Say so plainly, offer alternatives, and propose a sequence: "My current manager does not know I am looking. I can offer my previous line manager and a client sponsor now, and I am glad to have my current manager contacted once I have accepted and resigned." That is almost always accepted.

Preparing the referee

This is where the work is, and most candidates skip it. Send each referee a short message containing:

• The role and organisation, and a link to the posting.
• Your CV as sent.
• Two or three things you would like them to emphasise, framed as reminders rather than instructions.
• Anything they may need to explain — a gap, a short tenure, a restructure.
• The likely timing and format: email form, phone call, or written.
• A thank-you, and an offer to update them either way.

The two or three emphases matter most. A referee who has been reminded that you ran the two-site coverage will mention it. One who has not will describe you generically, because they are recalling three years of work in a five-minute call with no notice.

What employers may ask

In many jurisdictions employers give minimal factual references as policy — dates, job title, sometimes whether you are eligible for rehire — to limit liability. If your former employer has that policy, say so in advance so its brevity is not read as coldness.

Where fuller references are given, expect questions about dates and title, reason for leaving, attendance and timekeeping, working relationships, whether there were disciplinary matters, and whether they would re-employ you. That last one carries disproportionate weight, and a hesitation before the answer is noticed.

When there is a problem

If a former relationship ended badly, do not hide it and hope. A surprise at reference stage ends processes; a disclosed difficulty usually does not.

Say it early, briefly, and without attacking the other person: "My time at Meridian ended in disagreement with my manager over the reporting standard. They will confirm dates and title. I would suggest speaking to the operations director instead, who oversaw the work directly." That sentence gives the employer a route and demonstrates composure, which is often what they are really assessing.

Afterwards

Tell your referees the outcome, thank them specifically, and keep them warm. A referee used and then never contacted again is unlikely to be as helpful the next time — and there is always a next time.